Is Disappointment Just A Part of Life?

For those of you who’ve been reading my blog, you know that last month I had surgery on my right ear to remove a tumor that had rendered me totally deaf. I was already deaf in my left as a result of a childhood illness. The doctor had promised a complete recovery—and that my hearing would be “better than ever before”. But what he didn’t say at the time was that it would take three months for the hearing in my right ear to fully return. On the bright side, I can hear now. But I’m only at 50% of my former hearing. I guess sometimes, our expectations exceed what nature has planned. Of course, it makes sense that my ear would need time to heal. And I’m certainly grateful we live in a world where this kind of surgery can be done. But to be honest, the disappointment over the immediate results has sent me into a funk. And I’m sure that I’m not the only patient who ever went through a procedure hoping to be quickly back to 100% once it was over.

Buck Up

You’d think it would be hard to wallow in self-pity when you’ve had such a good life. Well, take it from me. It’s not hard. That said, there are things I’ve learned through all this, and so, in the spirit of sharing, I thought I’d pass them along:

1. One way to view a personal struggle is to consider it a character-building moment. How we manage through the experience says a lot about who we are. You can choose to handle it well or poorly. I assure you, handling it poorly doesn’t make anyone feel any better. Certainly not you, and definitely not your family.
2. When frustrated, it’s not a bad idea to challenge yourself to a game. For me, I’ve searched for other ways to say “what”—a word I say a lot these days. So far, I’ve come up with “excuse me”, “pardon”, and when I’m in the mood to laugh, “hey” with a palm held up to my ear like an old codger. If you have any other suggestions, please let me know.
3. Everyone has their problems. But if you’re lucky, when you face a challenge, others will jump in and share it with you. I’ve been lucky. So many people have gone out of their way to wish me well. Those kind words have meant a lot.
4. When it comes to your health, you have to be your own best advocate. Sadly, I allowed my hearing loss to go on way too long before finally connecting with a surgeon. Had I pressed for a CT Scan sooner, the tumor would have been found earlier. Live and learn.
5. Every day is a gift. But that gift can either be a lump of coal or a lovely bouquet. It all depends on what you’re expecting. So try, if you can, to remain positive. I hear it’s worth the effort.

And Now, Something Extra!

This month, I thought I’d share a video of Gilda Radner as Emily Litella from Saturday Night Live. Emily always seemed to get everything wrong. Did she need a hearing aid? Probably. But I definitely identified with her over the last few weeks. So take a moment to step back and laugh along with Gilda, Emily, and me. And be sure to have a wonderful Thanksgiving!